Route with a View

Here are a few scenes from life on the route. I love working from my office on wheels. There's so much to see out there. More to come later.

One of the MANY dogs on my route - with his favorite toy - part of a 4 x 4 post.

I know it's not a very good picture but this really is the Space Shuttle going in for a landing at a local Air Force base.

Hay rolls in a flooded field - looks like they are floating in a pond.

Black cat in a white swing - with just his head and ears showing.

Mail Primer

OK. Listen up, people. This is how it works. This is my EMPTY mail case, fresh as it is every morning.
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This is the mail -- on a cart, fresh off of the truck that delivers every morning.

This is also the mail, pulled from the cart, fresh off of the truck that delivers every morning.



This is some of the mail -- in stacks and trays.


TA-DA! This is after I have magically put all those magazines, catalogs, and letters into one of any of the over 400 slots in my case. Correctly, with no mistakes. haha! So easy even a caveman can do it. Or not.

Oh, yeah. Here it is all loaded up and ready to be delivered. Woo-hoo.

Amazing Grac- uh - Grader?

One road on my route is a long, lonely dirt/gravel mess that has to be graded after every rain...and after weeks of no rain. The man who usually grades it is... well... you decide.
I was toodling along the other day, going about 20 mph, on the wrong side of the road (to stay out of the "graded-up rubbish"). I see the parked grader way up the road, the driver standing in the shade of it. As I slowly approach (trying to keep the dust to a minimum), he begins to flag me down. Oh, boy. Should I? Or, not? I have heard rumors about him. I decide to see if they are true. So I stop. Roll down my window just a bit (my doors are locked).
"Hello, there, ma'am," he says, and introduces himself. I look him over carefully from behind my sunglasses. He's an older fellow, long pointy nose, and bald head.
"On my lunch break, I work for Jesus. Can I talk to you about him and your soul?"
Yep! Rumors were true!
I smile. "Well, I appreciate the offer, but I already have a good relationship with Him."
"Well, praise the Lord! And you've been saved?"
I nodded.
"And you go to Sunday School and church like he wants us to do after we've been saved?"
I'm still nodding. And easing the Jeep forward, easing forward.
"Well, praise the Lord!" And he steps back into the shade of his road grader, his hands clasped and head bowed in prayer.
You know you are a RURAL mail carrier when you have been approached by a road-grading evangelist. God Is Truly Everywhere!

Blah, blah, blah

Some days I feel like I'm a talking head. Just shoulders and a head riding in a Jeep. Oh yeah, with arms, too. Got to have arms and hands to deliver all that wonderful mail. huh
Example: I was shopping at Wal-Mart one day, pushing my cart, minding my own business when I spied one of my customers. I stopped to speak to them. I was greeted with a blank stare. I knew the problem. Explained that I was their mail carrier. Light bulb comes on. "Oh, yeah! Well, I didn't recognize you without a Jeep window frame around you." ha-ha

Another one: I see one of my customers at a small convenience store. "Hey, are you the mail lady?" (He's looking at my ID badge.) "Yes, I am. How are you today?" "Oh, fine. I didn't recognize you standing up!" (Excuse me?) I looked around to see if anyone else heard him. (I don't want folks to think he WOULD recognize me lying down!) I say, "That's OK. No one recognizes me when I'm outside of my Jeep." (Sheesh.)

Spongebob??

One of my customers took down their very nice, CONVENIENTLY large mailbox and replaced it with one that looks like a big catfish with an even bigger fish hook in its mouth (said hook also serves as the door handle.) When I pulled on the hook, the whole catfish head bent forward to open and reveal the box inside the belly of the fish. EEWWWW!
In that moment, the theme song from Spongebob Squarepants popped into my head. (I know, but that's how my mind works.) Sooo, being sorta bored I made up new lyrics to Spongebob's tune. Here goes:
Oooohhhh...who delivers the mail to him under the sea?
Spongebob's Mailman!
Who knocks on his door with Express Delivery?
Spongebob's Mailman!
If a creepy mailbox be something you wish
Then run down to Lowe's and catch a big fish!
Spongebob's Mailman, Spongebob's Mailman,
Spongebob's Mail---Man!!

Dusty, the wonder dog

This is Dusty Husovsky, the wonder dog. He loved to come to work with John at the Post Office. After a hard morning of sorting mail, he enjoyed a tasty Little Debbie's chocolate something or other, a big sloppy slurp of water, and then a short jaunt around the outside of the Post Office-- where he would drain his radiator. Back inside, he would woof-woof incessantly until you gave him your LAST Little Debbie's. After another sloppy slurp he would say thank you by rubbing his slobber all over your pants leg.

Dusty died the other day. It sure is quiet at the Post Office. I miss you, Dusty.

And behind this door...

Some of the more unusual things I have found in mailboxes: 1. A bird 2. A bird nest 3. A bird nest with eggs 4. A bird nest with baby birds 5. A gazillion wasps 6. A bazillion wasp nests 7. A katrillion spiders

8. A trazillion fire ants 9. A coiled copperhead snake - dead, but still scared hell out of me! 10. A dead rabbit 11. A crow's wing - minus the crow 12. An envelope with a zip-lock bag inside. The bag contained, unbeknownst to me, a sample of pond water. This was on a very hot day. Can you guess what happened when I picked up the envelope? Yes, the bag burst. Hot, stinky liquid got all over me. It smelled like stagnant stump water and horse pee. And this was just after the anthrax mailings! I was not a happy mail carrier. Stay tuned. I have a feeling this list will grow.